God, I felt so stupid! I'd actually broken down and cried, right there in the room with Mark! How the hell could I ever face him again?
At least I'd managed to calm myself down by the time I got back to the main office. I'm sure my eyes were red from bawling my head off like that, but I managed to stop shaking, and at least hold my head up like I was in control again.
Beth, who was in uniform and at my size, met me at the door to my newly assigned section of floor. "How'd the meeting go?" she asked, at first pretending to look hopeful, but then responding as if she could see in my face that things hadn't gone well at all. She was a reasonably good actor, I thought, but I was sure she'd seen the whole thing, and was just trying not to let on that she knew.
"Not well, not well at all," I replied, trying not to sound too distressed, but obviously failing. I remember thinking at this point that she was probably going to fire me, and that my whole mission would be over. Ha! I should have been so lucky.
She frowned, looking at me closely, and I'm sure she could tell I'd been crying. "Did he try to take advantage of you?" she asked me, nothing but concern in her eyes.
"No," I told her truthfully. "No, he just tried to help me, and I--and I freaked out on him. I'll be all right. He was holding me, and I--I just couldn't handle it. I'm sorry."
Beth nodded. "Well, that's all right," she said, putting her hand on my shoulder, her voice assuming that motherly tone again. I was getting to really hate that voice, because it made me feel like I wasn't able to take care of myself. What was worst was, at least in this case, it was true!
"Don't worry, Ashley, I've seen your kind before," she went on. "You WILL get used to it, I promise you. No one ever gets over a fear of shrinking on the first try. Give it time. Some of our best employees are like you, at one time afraid of it and now big fans."
"I hope you're right," I replied, trying to sound sorry without being too pathetic. "I appreciate you giving me all these chances. I know you could just let me go, with all the trouble I'm giving you."
"Nonsense!" laughed Beth. "Do you know how hard it is to find girls with the kind of skills you have, who are willing to let themselves be shrunk down like this? Paah-leeeze! You're no trouble at all. Like I said, keep working on it, and in no time this'll all seem like a bad memory. Now, it's time to get to work! Go on out there and make me proud!"
"All right," I agreed without enthusiasm, and headed out into the casino. Beth followed for a few minutes to make sure I had the route right, then headed back to her supervisory post in front of the cameras.
Much to my surprise, I found that her little speech had actually boosted my spirits. Within a few minutes I'd managed to paint the smile back on my face and start serving customers as though nothing had happened.
Fortunately, with being so close to the ground, no one could get a good look at my eyes, because they must have been red and puffy. It's a good thing I don't like to use mascara, or it would've been all over my face, too.
Like Heather had already let on, the walking of the route last night had given me a false impression of the casino floor. It was, in fact, three times bigger than I'd practiced, which took some getting used to. After about an hour or so, though, I was walking it like I'd done it all my life, and doing triples and quads like they were no trouble at all. I even managed to remain cheerful, despite how I was really feeling.
Lori was working the same route I was, but she was halfway ahead of me, like race car drivers who are half a lap apart. I'd pass her occasionally going the other way, and we'd exchange words, but there was no way we could carry on a conversation, which was just as well. I wanted to be alone with my thoughts anyway.
For a while, I was annoyed and frustrated with myself for letting my fears run away with me, but after a bit, I started to think about some other things that had gone on during the meeting. Mark had acted very strangely all throughout the whole affair. He'd been nervous, and almost frightened by what was going on. And the way he looked at me was very disturbing. Plus, I was sure he wanted to tell me something important there at the end, but for whatever reason, he couldn't.
I wanted to ask him about that, but I was sure I wouldn't be able to face him after my performance, at least not for a while. Fortunately, I had the weekend off, which would give me until Monday to figure out what to say.
Lori's shift ended a couple of hours before mine, and she told me she was going to hang out at the bar until Heather was done on the blackjack table. I'd forgotten all about that. She was getting her tryout tonight, and it meant she'd be shrunk by a factor of 20, leaving her right around a foot tall.
Unconsciously, I felt my fear welling up in me again. I still hadn't learned to handle 33, so how was I going to stand 20, or even smaller? Beth had said something about making me do roulette, which would be a 15 factor, putting me at around eleven inches high, including the heels. I didn't think I'd be able to stand being that small!
After my shift was over, I decided to go see how Heather was holding up, although I already suspected what she'd be like. Thrilled probably wasn't a strong enough word, I suspected. In any case, though, I'd already determined that a trip to a bar was just what I needed tonight, so I needed to blow off some time anyway.
Once I was back to normal size, I asked Beth where Heather was, and she told me she was still on the practice table. See, each of the various games had practice areas where the new employees learn the ropes, before going out on the main floor. Not a bad idea, I thought, especially considering how careful gamblers were with their money. Casino dealers had to have impeccable card-handling skills.
Before changing, I made my way to the training area, and found Heather there, practicing pulling cards out of the specially modified dealer's shoe and passing them around the table. She didn't notice me at first, which gave me a chance to get a look at her.
Damn, she was small! Yeah, I'd seen the blackjack tables before, and poker too, but had never looked at the ladies that closely. As I'd suspected, Heather stood about a foot high, looking very much like an animated Barbie doll as she pulled the cards out and carried them to their destinations. The tight costume, with its body-shaping bustier, even made her figure look as proportional as Barbie's, which of course was the whole idea.
After a moment she looked up and noticed me sitting there. "Hi, Ashley!" she called out in a very soft voice, hurrying over to the edge of the table, still holding one of the cards in her hand. It was about a third as big as she was, but she carried it like it wasn't even there. How long had she been practicing, I wondered?
"Hi, Heather," I replied. "Wow, look at you! You're so tiny!"
"Yeah, ain't it great?" she replied excitedly, beaming up at me. Her voice was thin and reedy, and she was obviously raising it to make sure I could hear her completely. "Check me out! I'm only twelve inches high! I thought everythin' was big before, but now look at the world!"
"How the hell can you be so happy about that?" I said, amazed at her enthusiasm, especially after what I'd just been through.
"Oh, Ashley, this is what I've always dreamt about!" she yelled happily, spinning around and tossing the card away from her. She made a couple of flowing moves across the table's felt surface, as though floating on air. "Hey, do me a favor!" she said after a moment, looking up at me hopefully. "Please, pick me up!"
"Oh, no, I couldn't!" I protested, remembering how difficult it had been for me to say those words just a few hours ago. "I wouldn't--well, anyway, it's against the rules!"
"Don't worry, I give you permission!" she called out. Glancing over at the camera dome in the ceiling, she pantomimed herself climbing into my hand, then gave a thumbs-up. "Please, Ashley, I've been thinkin' about this all day! You don't haveta do anythin', just pick me up!"
I looked down at the tiny figure on the table, who was staring up at me with an almost pleading expression on her face. "Oh, all right, if you insist!" I surrendered. Maybe doing this would make me feel better about my own predicament later on.
Reaching down with one hand, I carefully scooped her up in my palm, not grasping her at all, but keeping my fingers positioned so she couldn't fall out. "Whee!" she yelled excitedly as I raised her into the air, holding her up to my face and marveling at her small size. She laughed out loud, wriggling around in my hand like I was tickling her or something.
I rolled my eyes. How could she enjoy that so damn much? It was infuriating!
I set her back down carefully, and she jumped off and almost danced across the table. "Thanks, Ashley! I needed that!" She looked up at me with a kind of wistful expression. "God, if only you were a man! Oh, that woulda been totally sweet!"
I looked down at her, shaking my head. Well, at least that answered one question I'd been wondering about. Now I knew Heather's interests only swung one way. "You're welcome...I think," I replied. "I just don't get you, Heather. I wish I did, but I don't."
"That's okay!" she laughed up at me. "I don't get me, either! Hey, I'd better get back to work now! See you after!"
"Sure, see you later," I said, and headed back to change into my street clothes.
Heather was a weird one, all right. As I disengaged myself from that stupid corset, I wished I could be as excited about being picked up as she was. What was it about her that made her like it so much? Maybe whatever it was, I could learn it myself, and get past this ridiculous phobia.
Somehow, I had to figure out her secret!